Chatting with the terrific moms in my Transitions parenting class has made me think lately about the passage of time. There’s nothing like seeing my former toddlers entering Kindergarten to remind me about the steady ticking of the clock.
Hearing
about the trials and tribulations of the first few weeks of The Big
K from these new Kinder-moms is a great reminder about how foundational human development is. Everything that we experience today is built on the
foundation of all our yesterdays. And today we’re already working on the
foundation for tomorrow!
Working on a lecture for my college level child development course, I found a research-based list of typical
thinking patterns that have been proven to be common to teenagers who get into
trouble. When I look at that list, it seems obvious that the first
ingredient for a happy and healthy teenager is a happy, healthy preschooler.
Even though some of our recent preschool graduates are going through some adjustments right now as they get used to Kindergarten, I know that eventually they will be just fine. The positive, affirming experiences of preschool provide a solid foundation for just the kinds of challenges those new
Kindergarteners are facing today as they’re getting used to the demands of
big-kid-school. I hope their parents will have faith in that sturdy
developmental infrastructure through the inevitable challenges their children will face in the next few years. But it’s probably even more important to understand that in 8, 10, or 12 years,
these children will still be building on all of that early
learning.
Here’s
an item from that Aggressive Adolescents list:
-Aggressive
adolescents tend to have a narrow view of ways to solve problems.
According
to this research, when teens don’t know how to solve problems, they resort to
aggression. Even the smallest conflict can quickly escalate to violence, simply
because the kids lack the skills needed to handle things
peacefully.
What
is the first thing we start learning on Day One in Teacher Annie’s toddler
classes? Problem solving, of course. “I see you both want the same
truck. What can you do about that? I can help you find another one, or
ask your friend for a turn.” “Oops, the water spilled. How can we clean
it up?” Incidentally, today actually was Day One, and yes, that’s exactly what we talked
about over and over and over. And I LOVE it! Sometime I should try
to count exactly how many opportunities for problem-solving lessons naturally
arise in the course of a typical morning in my two year old class. I’m sure
that each child must encounter dozens of them in our two hours of living,
working, and playing together.
Problem
solving is the cornerstone of early childhood curriculum, and any preschool
teacher who’s worth their “big salary” understands that. Thankfully do not
outgrow those lessons they way they outgrow shoes, and the most important
lessons don’t get lost in the “inner space” of teenage brains. They’re in
there. They have become part of the hard-wiring, the structure of
the brain. Good parents and good teachers can work together to make sure
that important lessons from early childhood are reinforced all along the way.
Another
example from that rather alarming Aggressive Adolescents list:
Teens
who engage in aggressive behaviors show little capacity for empathy, or seeing
things from another person’s point of view.
Again,
what better place to begin learning empathy than preschool? Today in my
2’s class, I observed many, many examples of our “Empathy 101” curriculum
in action. For example, I saw dozens of signs of real learning and growth
in the few minutes I was helping my little newbies meet Freckles The School
Bunny for the first time, “What did Freckles tell you when you poked him just
now? See how he moved away from you? What do you think he wants you
to know?”quickly led to “I see Freckles has moved close to you now. And I see
that you’re petting him gently. How do you think Freckles feels
now?” It’s one life lesson after another, all day every day in
preschool. These lessons are always individualized so they can exactly
meet the current developmental path of each child. This way, the learning sinks
in deeply and permanently. It becomes a part of them.
Take
a look at these other items from The List, and then think about what your child
learns in preschool every day:
Aggressive
and at-risk adolescents:
-have
little or no attachment or sense of belonging
-are
unable to think in advance about consequences of their behavior
-do
not engage in critical thinking skills, often leading to aggression based on
illogical or incomplete information
It's not hard to see how
appropriate preschool experiences can prevent a lifetime of problems.
So
don’t waste too much time fretting about the future. Try to enjoy every
minute with your little ones. Realize that the time, thought, and effort
that you and your preschool teachers are investing now will serve your children
well for the rest of their lives.
It’s
true:
A
happy childhood can last a lifetime!
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Ugh my round boy hair!
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