"Would you like to walk by yourself, or do you want me to help you?"

If I am a toddler, this in an intriguing choice. It gives me the power to choose, and the comfort of knowing that the big person will help me if I prefer. Sometimes I just don't want to walk by myself, and sometimes i really, really really do. But I know what I want, so it's an easy decision, even if I am very young. If Mom, Dad, or Teacher has truly offered only choices that are perfectly ok with them, everyone is getting what they want and need.

Within seconds, the child, the whole situation, is un-stuck. We're now on our way to bed, to the car, to wash our hands, wherever it was we were going when we decided to veer of course.

Choices.

Simple. Easy. Effective. Respectful.